Déjà vu

Are Déjà vu  experiences…

glimpses into our purpose and destiny….


The Male equivalent of Beautiful

I’m sure many of you know that calling a girl beautiful is one of the highest compliments you could give her. Its perhaps deeper and more meaningful than the words cute, hot, or pretty.  As a matter of fact I’ve been advised to believe  I am “…beautiful no matter what they saaay” (  that comes from the song “Beautiful” Christina Aguilera).

Anyway, I wondered what the Male equivalent of that was. Well, I happened to stumble upon what I think is the male equivalent is. Nick vujicic, as giving a speech or talk to group of kids and I remember saying something like: ( to the girls),  “You are beautiful” and towards the boys he laughed saying,  “You the man!!”  

Sure enough there was a song that came out

So anything like “You’re the man!!”  suffice to say will probably really uplift a guy.

Going deeper this related to this song “According  to You” by Orianthi  basically seeing  yourself in a good positive way.

In addition, I remember hearing to “You see yourself as good next to the cross”. I have an inkling of the understanding of that but I could delve deeper.


Maybe you can find out a lot about yourself by looking at what you like…for example. Music, songs, or artist…why do you like about that music…

( been on a long journey of self-discovery…so this possible insight came to me ..I had been searching online and in books..)  digging deeper..

Why do you like it/him/her..? What is it that you like about it/him/her…? What does it/him/her remind you of? Memories the song brings up..?

What do these show you about what you value?

Consistent, gradual, steps

This was in January.

I just started a job. I don’t want to be there..Why did I do this to myself…I wasted so much time.. driving surfing , lounging, around online and before you know it, I’m at job that nearly seems to threaten my psychological well being,..I mean I wasn’t doing great to begun with..let’s why not ,   throw a monkey bar in the wrenches and see what happens ? ..smh

It’s been tough to say the least, to make matters worse it’s in a field that I don’t think I should be in.

in the future maybe I might decide to at last come into this field but maybe not..

Anyway, there is this lady there, several years younger than I  who works there, too. She for sure has let me know this is the field , career she wants , like from the depths of  her heart she informed me this is what she wants.

notice I bolded and italicized words  depths of  her heart ,  her heart let me know she wanted this so bad .  I remember her saying last year, many months ago something like   I really want to be  a doctor. The way she said it her heart had spoken, her mind.. This is where her mind was. I ‘ve been sort of double minded concerning becoming a physician   Being in the graduate program for pre-dental, med students  I felt perhaps out of place. I look back and think I must have have thought more than once, what the heck am I doing here.

 Was this my dream? Was this something I yearned for? ( from the depths of my heart, my soul?) 

Anyway fast forward several months later into this new year.   And she is steadily working towards a goal, and nearing closer to overcoming  one of the biggest obstacles related to entering this field. I can’t barely  imagine her not reaching her goal in this step of the process to becoming a doctor.

I on the other hand have not done too much.  I have several things I’d like to do, and I want to accomplish them in a short time.. perhaps not all my motives are pure for pursuing a certain career is pure. I   Just to have to pray to have the right mind heart on this matter, concerning what I’d want …

Long story, what this former classmate wants and what I want are different..at least as far as I know.  Her goal, career wise, though hard to enter, is attainable. Many people have been able to enter this school, nevertheless I am not going to say its a piece of cake. I guess what I want it nearly astronomical, ..Well it’s not impossible , but even perhaps far less have achieved or gone where I want to go.

Which brings me to the complaint I voiced inside concerning my predicament while I was at that job. I saw, see  her ..well on route to accomplishing her goal. My thought,  the way I saw it was oh God, what she wants is sooooo easy compared to what I want..here I am barely having gotten anywhere…it such a horrible place to be in ( I know there are far worse circumstances to be in )

Any who, it seemed like the next morning on facebook, I cam across this title from Graham Cooke ministry facebook post

How to Partner with God to Fulfill Impossible Dreams.  http://brilliantperspectives.com/fulfill-impossible-dreams/

I was like “Wahh!!” that’s me. It feels close to impossible as compared to her dream.

I eventually read the article and felt like it was Him who let me know what to do in  situation like my mine..start small and work your way up consistently. Eventually you can do more that you could have ever imagined!!!

Any who I need to work on doing just that. Again thanks to  Him for this timely article.

Pouring out my heart

Well, I heard a testimony from a woman. She said she used to be needy , in other words desperate for love.  And that neediness was not attractive.

She found though that when she poured out her heart to God, The Holy Spirit , God would fill that hole with his love and acceptance.  Through doing that she came to no longer be needy . His love built her up and she seemed to become her own person.

I think she said was perhaps scared that would God reject her judge her if he poured out her heart to him, but no, he didn’t do that.

Instead, he poured in love and acceptance

To be honest, I am blessed by that testimony. I have some trust issues with Him. So I think its perhaps something he wants to bring to my attention. I know there is verse in the Bible where David encourages for God’s people to pour out their heart before Him:

Psalm 62:8 ESV
Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah

I know for relationships that self-disclosure is an important part of building close, intimate, enduring relationships. This could also relate to your relationship with the heavenly Father.

I guess little by little I could start off and build from there.


So for awhile now , I have been up in arms considering what direction I should go as concerning having an income stream.

I  have been on track many years pursuing a career that may just not be right for me.. ( there was some breaks during this period but I they weren’t breaks I wanted..)

I’ve racked up enough loans to pay off house. I’ve been on the treadmill distracted, unfocused and getting by but not prospering in other words it been tough.. not not only this but other issues making for an unhappy ride..nevertheless, I do know that there are people who have it worse then me. I should be grateful and do what I know could help me.. eg. the counsel of the Most High…

So one of these recent morning I got the word ( something like this )

“In a place of space you will discover what it is you like”

I was so grateful to get that..It’s an answer to what I’ve been wanting..


Far far too long .. years.. I spend my days constantly engaged in activity, mostly the internet ..I sort of spend my days aimless..not really taking control, the reins of my life ..

I heard about space earlier… it seemed like ( maybe it was angels) said in dream that if I make some space in my life, that I would get a reward..

The example they gave of someone taking space, was perhaps a guy apart  maybe apart of some sort of musical act taking a break from touring.. I guess the key words or phrase*  is “taking a break”

Which reminds me of something else I heard, It was perhaps,   “Study the bridge of truth ..the lull”

one of the definition of lull is

noun: lull; plural noun: lulls
  1. 1.
    a temporary interval of quiet or lack of activity.
    “for two days there had been a lull in the fighting”
    synonyms: pause, respite, interval, break, hiatus, suspension, interlude, intermission, breathing space; More

    antonyms: activity


interestingly enough, “breathing space” and “break” are synonyms of the word lull

Maybe I should look up the definition of space…Well I looked it up on one site, but that didn’t yield anything that might help me understand it more..I looked up space idiom and got breathing space again..

All in all after watching especially this vid

I feel I have to like really somehow..not be so engaged in tasks constantly throughout the day..too much activity that I forget my focus , my goal, what things I should really be doing concentrating on to get. For some reason I get pulled to be online a lot.. :/




*disclaimer: I am not too familiar with this youtuber, so she may believe things that I don’t .Basically, I am not like condoning all her beliefs ( you may encounter in other vids)